"Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end..." - Closing Time, by Semisonic

It would appear this phase of my career/education is starting to wind down. I look to it with both joy and sadness. I was discussing change with my wife recently, and the ability to embrace it or to fight/deny it. I would love to be the person who embraces change; regrettably, I tend to be the type who struggles with it. Over the last 2 years I have been pursuing a life's dream by getting a culinary education, and it has been an amazing gift in so many ways. My cooking has improved, I am better organized in the kitchen - mise en place, mise en place, mise en place, and I hold a greater respect for where our food comes from and the people, plants, animals and ecosystems involved. I have also met people in the program who are amazingly talented - as cooks, culinarians, teachers, and all around wonderful friends.

I realize how much more I want to improve and learn from others in seeking perfection. I do measure myself by a fierce yardstick, always finding something; a sauce I could make better, a brunoise cut I can be more precise on, or bringing joy and pleasure to people I work with in the kitchen. Patience and proportion in the kitchen are important - a lesson I am still learning and trying to practice in a better way.

The crossroads stands before me, waiting for action - where will it lead next?

Black Squid Ink Paella Cakes
Serves 12 appetizer or 6 as main course
A recipe from adapted from my Chef of the Day menu

Serve these as an appetizer with some quickly garlic and red pepper flakes sautéed prawns, calamari or other seafood of choice and a red pepper coulis for a dramatic presentation. I call this a paella cake because it has a crunchy texture after frying the cakes reminiscent of true Spanish paella. The squid ink in concert with a good fish stock brings a wonderful seaside quality to it as well. Plan on making the paella cakes a day ahead of time to set before frying them.

32 fl oz fish stock or vegetable stock
1 T squid ink
2 T olive or grape seed oil + oil for frying
1 med yellow onion, small dice
1-2 cloves garlic
1 c Valencia rice
1 c dry white wine
Salt and pepper to taste

1) In a saucepan, warm stock over medium-low heat. Reserve 1 cup of stock to mix with squid ink.
2) Over medium heat warm 2 T of oil, begin sautéing onion until translucent (not brown), roughly 5 to 8 minutes.
3) Add garlic continuing to sauté for about 2 minutes more - do not let the garlic turn brown or burn.
4) Stir in rice and heat until rice starts to turn slightly brown.
5) Add white wine stirring until liquid has been absorbed.
6) Begin by adding reserved cup of stock with squid ink, mixing until rice absorbs liquid.
7) Continue adding stock 1 cup at time, waiting until liquid is absorbed before adding the next.
8) Check for al dente consistency, if more liquid is needed use a little bit of water.
9) Season with salt and pepper to taste.
10) Remove from heat and let cool. The rice should be sticky to the touch.
11) Line a baking sheet with plastic wrap.
12) Using a quarter cup measure, dip in a bowl of water to moisten - this will help rice come out of cup.
13) Lightly pack rice into cup and carefully place onto plastic wrap.
14) Refrigerate 8 hours or overnight.
15) Over medium heat coat bottom of frying pan with oil.
16) In batches of 4 - 5 fry paella cakes making sure to get a nice crispy crust on the bottom.
17) Flip once and continue to fry until warmed through.